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Father, husband and currently in-between jobs. Just relocated to Michigan from Nebraska and am on the hunt for work! These are my musings about life so far and what I've done.

Saturday, October 6, 2007

Just Testing

So I took my SAT yesterday morning. It wasn't the first time I'd taken it, so I was vaguely familiar with the procedure.

"You may now turn your test booklet over and write your name, address, social security number and all existing credit card account information in the blanks provided."

It was comparatively easy to the previous time. I pretty much had the drill down.

"Please place all pencils, calculators and brains on the desk in front of you. Do not put your brains in until you are told to do so. Any extra brain batteries must be approved. If you put your brains in before permitted, your test will automatically be disqualified and you will be shot down by a sniper from the opposite building and your body will be dumped in the nearest convenient landfill."

I was in the zone. I heard a voice droning on somewhere around me about rules and regulations, but I didn't pay attention to that. It was just a bunch of bureaucratic red tape anyway.

"Please be sure that all automatic weaponry is set to "safe" and placed under your desk. Do not attempt to take any test material out of the room. The "swapping" of brains will not be tolerated. Your family will be hunted down and held for ransom on E-bay."

The instructor was fairly nice. He was one of those types who would make a pun if the occasion arose, or even say something funny.

"You will have as many minutes as it takes me to finish knitting this sweater for my new little niece. Turn to page one in your test booklet and good luck with the rest of your life... "

If you don't want an average public high schooler to understand what you write, use cursive. It's like a foreign language to them. The only kids who honed any real cursive skills were the math geeks. You know the ones: long, greasy hair, black Led Zeppelin tee-shirt, bleach-white skin from staying inside all day long playing online role-playing games and bad eyesight from staring at the screen of his scientific calculator and computer screen into the early hours of the morning.

So that was pretty much my day at the test center. It was fun.

:)

~Curtis~

7 comments:

Jessica said...

LOL you are so funny. Haha I never had to tkae the SAT oh the joy of being homeschooled and starting community college when you are 16. I love the drama though. You get funnier with every post. Man I think I need to be more funny lol.
Great post Curtis!!
Seeya later Bro!

Curtis said...

Thankya thankya! *grins* I'm just warming up. I haven't done freewriting in sooo long. It's good to be back. :) Hopefully the hilarity will improve even beyond this. It usually isn't very hard for me to think of completely insane situations or ideas.

Jessica said...

I think you have just been keeping it from me lol. Although I have caught you on a rare angry catfish day. I am enjoying it though heehee.
See you later Bro!
Jessica

Johanna said...

LOL. Curtis, this is so funny. I actually laughed out loud. I dont do that very often when I'm reading stuff. keep it up! glad the test went good for you. :)

Nikki Moore said...

hehe, that's funny curtis! great observations.

Anonymous said...

omg SAT!! lol i took a PSAT the other day it was fucking crazy like i was soooo confused what the fuck did these peopel come up with questions and problems like that lol i so flunked...na lemme stop i think i did okay lol i just hope the real shyt aint like that.

Curtis said...

Woah, I didn't even notice that you'd left a comment, Keylla. Lol, sorry about that. Yea, I remember taking the PSAT. It wasn't too hard. If you can, get the Test Prep CD-ROM. That thing pretty much saved my butt. The ACT is so much easier than the SAT. You pretty much get points for guessing.